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<- Previous | Table of Contents | Next -> Digital Library - Digital Library-Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte


displeasing irregularity; write under it, “Portrait of a Governess,
disconnected, poor, and plain.” ‘Afterwards, take a piece of smooth
ivory-you have one prepared in your drawing-box: take your
palette, mix your freshest, finest, clearest tints; choose your most
delicate camel-hair pencils; delineate carefully the loveliest face
you can imagine; paint it in your softest shades and sweetest hues,
according to the description given by Mrs. Fairfax of Blanche
Ingram; remember the raven ringlets, the oriental eye;- What! you
revert to Mr. Rochester as a model! Order! No snivel!- no
sentiment!- no regret! I will endure only sense and resolution.
Recall the august yet harmonious lineaments, the Grecian neck and
bust; let the round and dazzling arm be visible, and the delicate
hand; omit neither diamond ring nor gold bracelet; portray
faithfully the attire, aerial lace and glistening satin, graceful scarf
and golden rose; call it “Blanche, an accomplished lady of rank.”
‘Whenever, in future, you should chance to fancy Mr. Rochester
thinks well of you, take out these two pictures and compare them:
say, “Mr. Rochester might probably win that noble lady’s love, if
he chose to strive for it; is it likely he would waste a serious
thought on this indigent and insignificant plebeian?”’ ‘I’ll do it,’ I
resolved: and having framed this determination, I grew calm, and
fell asleep.

I kept my word. An hour or two sufficed to sketch my own portrait
in crayons; and in less than a fortnight I had completed an ivory
miniature of an imaginary Blanche Ingram. It looked a lovely face
enough, and when compared with
the real head in chalk, the contrast was as great as self-control
could desire. I derived benefit from the task: it had kept my head
and hands employed, and had given force and fixedness to the
new impressions I wished to stamp indelibly on my heart.

Ere long, I had reason to congratulate myself on the course of
wholesome discipline to which I had thus forced my feelings to
submit. Thanks to it, I was able to meet subsequent occurrences
with a decent calm, which, had they found me unprepared, I
should probably have been unequal to maintain, even externally.
<- Previous | Table of Contents | Next -> Digital Library - Digital Library-Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte

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